Why John Edwards Is the Perfect Democrat

By Stella Paul, AMERICAN THINKER

Who would you rather have as vice president — Sarah Palin or John Edwards?

Obama took a million bucks from renowned Palin-curser Bill (“the C-word”) Maher, the only man in the world who makes Al Franken look couth. And then Obama used those bucks to make a political ad…attacking Sarah Palin.

Why would Obama waste his precious filthy lucre attacking an unsuccessful vice presidential candidate? Well, it sure distracted attention from the other failed veep contender who bobbed up in the news that week: “John Edwards Asks Judge Not to Destroy Sex Tape.”

John Edwards is the perfect Democrat. When you see him coming, you don’t know which to lock up first: your wallet or your daughters.

Edwards, who reportedtly also pals around with prostitutes, is on trial for a brilliant trifecta of exploitation of women. He seduced an old biddy into giving him campaign cash, which he gave to the airhead he was exploiting for sex, while cheating on the dying wife he exploited as a campaign prop.

Even by Democratic standards, this is sheer genius!

But he’s a great respecter of women’s rights, you know, just like the man who ran at the top of his ticket: John Kerry proudly stands up for the rights of women — to buy him new yachts he can avoid paying taxes on.

Kerry was given his start in politics by Ted Kennedy, that legendary champion of women’s rights. Well, not their right to breathe. Of course, we all know it was Mary Jo Kopechne’s fault: she should have practiced exhaling underwater.

And speaking of Kennedy, the same week Edwards was wrangling over sex tapes, Mimi Alford was trying to get somebody to listen to her disgusting stories about John F. Kennedy. Alford was a 19-year-old virgin when she went to work as President Kennedy’s intern. In short order, Kennedy deflowered her, pressured her into degrading sex acts with another man while he watched, and hustled her to raucous naked pool parties.

John Kennedy still glows behind the titanium hagiography that Democrats always construct for any president who manages a sufficient level of competence to not break the space-time continuum, which is why they never talk of Jimmy Carter or Lyndon Johnson.

And so the minute that Alford’s book came out, a panicky cry went out on publisher’s row: “Get me ten more books of Jack and Jackie on the beach in Hyannis!”

Democrats love to accuse Republicans of “waging war on women,” and to pose as women’s champions. In reality, Democrats attract an inordinate number of guttersnipes who in a healthier age were called “moral degenerates” for their ugly exploitation of women.

Line up, in your mind’s eye, Bill (she’s “trailer park trash”) Clinton, Eliot (“Socks”) Spitzer, Anthony (“Weiner”) Weiner, Al (“sex-crazed poodle”) Gore, and former New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevey, who used his wife as a campaign prop while he chased men around truck stops and put his male crush poet in charge of the state’s post-9/11 security.

And then there’s George Soros, the puppet master and financier of the entire Democratic Party enterprise, who was just sued for slapping and choking his Brazilian trophy girlfriend.

Of course, nothing makes Democrats happier than humiliating women and making money at the same time — and that, ladies and gentlemen, is the story of the TSA.

The Democrats’ thuggishness towards women makes them natural partners for Muslims looking to spread some sharia around the good old USA. Imagine how many rich women John Kerry can marry when polygamy is a go!

And that whole child marriage thing that’s so beloved by Muslims should work out great for Roman (“not rape-rape”) Polanski and the many Hollywood pals who petitioned for his freedom, like Woody (“Model Stepfather”) Allen, Martin Scorsese, and John Landis. According to these stalwart Democrats, drugging and sodomizing a 13-year-old girl is all in a day’s work!

Sharia is a criminal racketeering system built on the subjugation of women, under the guise of a superior morality. How could any self-respecting Democrat not love it?
Obama insisted on manipulating events to foment the ludicrous “Arab Spring,” even as CBS correspondent Lara Logan was being gang-raped in Tahrir Square by crazed Islamists, screaming their ultimate aphrodisiac: “Jew! Jew!”

Sssshhhhh….Don’t talk about that. The Democrats are too busy celebrating their fantasy of “Arab democracy.” Who cares how many women get raped?

Now Obama is bypassing Congress to give $1.5 billion to the Muslim Brotherhood, whom he lifted to power in Egypt.

Foreign Affairs magazine informs us that as soon as Obama forced out Mubarak, soldiers began subjecting female protesters to electric shocks and beatings and forcibly instituting virginity checks.

But it’s the Republicans waging war on women! Yeah, right. Just keep your eyes on the Democrats fighting against anti-sharia legislation here. And don’t give John Edwards any ideas about those virginity checks.

Write Stella Paul at Stellapundit@aol.com.